"What is a doula?"
I have heard this question many times.
I have seen/read definitions on social media platforms.
I have been imprinted by "concepts" of doula instead of doulas themselves.
I am a doula.
I want to offer conversations - faces - voices to the collective.
Birth doulas are beginning to be know....so are postpartum doulas......but there are many other doulas.
A doula is a person whom serves others in support while an individual crossing a threshold: support through a transition.
It is impossible to short list what a person as a Doula provides.
Because of this - the doula voice is unique.
The doula voice is valuable.
The doula voice is formed by real life transitions - all the parts to that - standing witness to them - and how supporting those whom are living them.
The doula voice is build from the "tough bits" the REAL bits. The bits that need support and require normalizing.
The doula voice is universal.
It knows no limitations of person or experience.
I want to build the collective concept of what doula is.
I believe a collective is as strong as the voices shared within it.
Many collectives are missing voices.
I am a doula - asking other doulas to come share their voice.
I deeply appreciate tea. I love mixing it, the history and power of herbal medicinals, the conversations over cups of tea, the nourishment of warmth and how it feels when receiving a cup of tea into the body.
Tea for me is mind and body soul care: Nourishment.
Doulas aim to nourish those they serve.
Therefore in my mind....
Doulas are Tea.
THE MOON>TEA>DOULA VOICE
I appreciate staying connected to the sky above me and seeking its guidance.
I have organized the tea talks around the lunar cycles.
I am asking doulas to speak with me on the new moon and full moon.
Candid, truth speak conversations - sharing their voice.
A COLLECTIVE: disease in boundaries
I believe a true collective amplifies differences.
That can be extremely triggering.
Differences challenge persons boundaries - so let's take a few breaths and look and boundaries.
BOUNDARIES are limitless
Stay with me.
Everyone has their own boundaries. A boundary is formed from life experiences - beliefs- information absorption - and yes...a boundary is rooted in judgment - and therefore is limitless to the individual whom is building their boundaries.
Boundaries become realities as the person embodies them.
Some boundaries are physical - some are mental.
Boundaries are a constant negotiation. They can change. They can evolve.
Boundaries are incredibly hard to understand and therefore for "upfold" as a boundary itself is build in a very evolving-life-dependant-personal-experience-way.
Boundaries are important.
Being open to understanding boundaries as confussing - can be helpful.
Respecting boundaries is a necessity.
So is: building them, voicing your own, listening to others build them, appreciating the existance of boundaries, knowing the boundaries may change and not asking them to change.
I think...BIG YEAH.
Why am I talking about boundaries?
Because when you have different voices come together - boundaries rub up on each other. Perspectives are shared. Realities are challenged.
Conflict and friction can leading to hurt.
I see this as a possibility with these talks.
I acknowledge the disease (dis-EASE of emotions) that can come from challenged boundaries or perspectives.
I want these talks to be growth potential for anyone participating within them.
UNDERSTANDING a collective is only as strong as the voices and person within it.
the move perspective - the strong the collective.
THAT BEING SAID.....
I am placing boundaries within this project as I am the know creating it.
This space (project) strives to be:
willing to share the tough bits
respectful of differences
Accountability: help it thrive
When you are a loving person whom becomes an accountability reminder for another loving person - GROWTH happens.
Let's try and foster that.
30-60 minute interviews with me on my Instagram account (or via another video platform)
The doula whom is speaking with me picks their topic
I may not know this doula - the point of this project is to GROW
Begin the talk by making yourself a cup of tea.
Tune in to listen.
The live recording of the talk is given to the doula whom spoke.
It remains live on my instagram account for one lunar cycle.
HERE ON MY BLOG (and perhaps another platform, I am not sure as I am trying to learn of options) is where I will be uploading the video chat forever along with the other posts I will compile,
Those posts (which will be on my instagram page and also in a post here) are:
a tea recipe from the doula whom spoke
a possible book recommendation from the doula whom spoke
a quote from the doula whom spoke
Allowing this to grow.....
If this feels like ooey-gooey good to you, and you would like to support this project:
Please follow my instagram account as that the current platform I am using for this project along with this blog.
Consider joining the Patreon Page of this project.
If you would like to share your voice over a cup of tea to add your voice to the collective: please start a conversation with me.
The more conversation we have: the more growth happens.
I cannot say where this will lead.
There are many roots to this project which nurture it - I will be sharing those roots along the way.
I want to say THANK YOU for being here.
I am so excited to journey with you on this.
The seasons and holidays are always celebrated in our home with making: cooking, crafting, and holding ceremony.
As many of you know, I am a certified Aromatherapist. Of course oils than have a huge presence in our seasonal/holiday traditions.
I begin introducing my sons to oils when they are around a year and a half with personal inhalers and creating their own diffusers.
Children love little treasures they can stick in a pocket or other small hidden space. These fun necklaces allow for this and is a wonderful whole family activity creating:
🌟 Fine motor dexterity opportunities
🌟 Sensory exploration
🌟 Health benefits depending on the oils
🌟 Family bonding time
Let’s talk dilution....ALWAYS
I want you to feel safe, confident and knowledgeable about using essential oils properly with your children. Essential oils are powerful: they are nature’s DNA: organic chemistry. There is much to learn about combining oils together and then combining them with your organic chemistry and what the outcome can create. Bellow I have listed a few recipes you can make for your leaf diffusing necklaces.
Most importantly: dilute in a carrier oil.
Carrier oil: vegetable oils: cold pressed unrefined are what I recommend.
Some common varieties I recommend for this project: apricot kernel, sweet almond, grape seed, olive.
Drop by drop for safety and accuracy.
1% dilution ration: ages 1.5-5 years: I Tbs spoon carrier oil with 2-3 drops essential oil.
2% dilution ration: ages 3-5 years: 1 Tbs carrier oil with 5-6 drops essential oil
A Few of My Favorite Autumn Recipes
These drop rations are not to the correct safety ratio for children: be sure to make your blend and then dilute the blend to the proper dilution safety ration.
All of these recipes are safe for your 2 + year old child. If you have a little one under two at home (you will see my younger 19 month old son in these pictures) I recommend using a single oil at the correct dilution ration.
18 months to almost 2:
Make your diluted essential oil blend up prior to constructing your leaf necklace: more on this in the directions below
3 drops palmarosa
1 drop tea tree
3 drop roman chamomile
3 drops ravensara
2 drops ginger
2 drops lavender
4 drops cedarwood atlas
2 drops roman chamomile
2 drops sweet marjoram
2 drops lavender
4 drops palmarosa
3 drops frankinscense
2 drops sweet orange
4 drops sweet orange
2 drop clary sage
1 drop ylang ylang
2 drop cedarwood atlas
Enjoy the adventure of collecting:
Essential oil dropper bottle
Felt leaves or felt to cut leaves from
Soft ribbon: we used recycled sari silk strips
Small earring hole punch or tapestry needle
Leaf themed or Autumn themed children’s book: you’ll see why in directions.
Optional: large hole beads
Begin by making your essential oil blend in your essential oil dropper bottle. You can create your blend using drop by drop mixology or have your older child make the blend.
Cap the bottle and shake well for 1 minute: we single a silly song while shaking and do a little dance.
Now let your synergy blend sit while you construct your necklaces.
1. Cut your desired necklace length + 6 inches: this gives space for knitting your leaf on and tying a bow in the back of the neck for wearing.
2. Make your leaves: these small felt leaves we had on hand. You can easily cut your own from felt. If you are cutting your own: invest in a high quality thick felt.
3. Punch your leaf: you can do this using a hole punch or tapestry needle.
4. Thread your ribbon through your leaf hole: using the tapestry needle, thumb tack, safety pin, wood skewer, pencil point: anything sharp to help you get the ribbon through the hole.
5. Add optional bead: this can help hold the leaf in play so it lays flat against your body.
6. Oil your leaves: three drops to each leaf to the front side of the leaf. Do not apply oil to the backside as this could than transfer to clothing and leave an oil stain.
7. Set the necklaces aside to dry. This is when you read your leaf/autumn themed children’s book. Read books for 5-10 minutes.
8. Wear your leaf necklace!
These also make wonderful car/ room diffusers.
If you create them I would love to see! Please share or tag me on your instagram so we can create together.
I hope you enjoy!
Warm autumn hug from my family to yours,
I need to preface this with the circumstances in which this is being written.
Baby woke upset- I could not find sleep land after getting him back into it. I have been up since 3:28Am. That is why I have the time to write this.
I began writing - he woke again at 4:30Am.
I am finishing this with him sleeping in my arms in the living room arm chair.
One of my breast may be exposed from nursing. I can no longer reach my coffee. Bummer.
On to the post.
We all know them - or we all virtually see one on social media.
The super mom.
The mom whom always has her hair done (what!?!! Washed?????? And styled!?F***!)
And makeup on....
Incredibly stylish clothes
Multiple children whom are all really stylish too *oh yes......she has more children than me and still looks amazing (more on that later!).....
And wearing heals while carrying her baby...
And has time to do her exercise in cute aerobic clothing...
And has the best (posed) mom bod ever...
And always has her eyes open and a beautiful smile on her face for pictures....
And is IN pictures instead of being the one taking them...
And creates her home to be a replicate of the most stylish decor...and its clean! (Whaaaaat?)
And cooks amazing nutritious meal that look like they are from a magazine and not a freezer...
And lives a natural organic life....
And is a successful in her work, with promotions and the opportunity to “climb the ladder”.....
And has a ton of friends (whom all look like her)....
And has no issues parenting.....
And her children will become worldly because she is so incredible...
And has a great sexual relationship with her partner....
I am so exhausted of “And.”
I’m so heartbroken from “And.”
Seeing, feeling, and holding the mommas I support as a doula whom feel all these “Ands.”
Truly makes me cry.
I have felt them too.
In business and in mothering.
You feel the pressure to be more. You feel that you are not enough, not doing enough, not achieving enough.
Perhaps this motivates you to do more or perhaps it cracks your soul a bit.
I personally have gone though both feelings of being motivated, but honestly have felt more self-disappointment and disempowerment from this crap.
Lets.Leave.that. POOP. Behind.
Known that it’s fake.
I should reframe that: perhaps it is real. At least the best moments were caught on camera. Perhaps that moms life is “THAT put together.”
More than likely not.
More than likely she has a lot more resources that perhaps you do not have.
More than likely she is not cooking her meals, playing with her children, cleaning her house, pushing her career forward: someone else is doing it for her.
More than likely her insecurities are her driving force. When truly bringing that concept into my heart, it makes me want to hug her.
Not from pity.
From seeing and feeling her not being able to stand strong in her authenticity.
No my every moment should be a perfect one. You will lose reality if trying to achieve that. That eliminates all space of real and all space for growth.
I wish every woman the ability to stand in her own self. To find her happy.
This is the only place in motherhood I hold judgement. No mother should feel she is not a super mom.
It takes a lot of courage to be strong enough to be real; to be happy with all that you are instead of what you want to become, or more what you were, to be vulnerable and show the “ugly.” This “ugly” in the realm of motherhood should be renamed Wonder Woman.
Share your moments. Use filters and special affects - they are too fun and cool not to. Try holding more consciousness to why you are sharing; making mental note of your reasonings. This is the goal I hold and encourage other mommas to hold.
Enjoy altering your moments - while remember to stay true.
Not every moment should be perfect.
What’s your goal in posting it. To make yourself feel better? To make others envious? To find sisterhood? There are countless reasons: know yours.
For the true Wonder Women: I admire your strength in being real and embracing it all. Your courage to not take others on: to not strive to be like someone else whom appears to be better. To not present any rendition of fake. To be present in you.right.now.
To be you. To be happy with the true you. There is only one of you.
Only you have that recipe.
That’s powerful. That’s real.
I’m honored to be a part of THAT motherhood pack with you.
I love simple, affective and do it myself-ing. Moms are on money and time budget - but being the queens we are we still deserve lavish treatments. Using natural ingredients to benefit your beauty routine is fun, easy, and nourishing.
Here’s one of my favorites.
With warmer weather this may need to be stored in the refrigerator or a cooler place if your interior home is reaching temperatures of over 74 degrees.
***as a side note do keep it out of reach from little ones- completely fine for them to eat but I caught my son trying to eat my entire stash 😂
You will need:
small dish or a small container with a lid which is large enough to hold 1-2 Tbs.
coconut oil : cold pressed and unrefined
Fine ground can sugar
* I highly recommend using organic ingredients
1. Add 1 tsp cocoa power and than 1 tsp. cane sugar to your dish.
2. Blend together
3. Add 1 tsp leveled out coconut oil
4. Blend and you’re done!
I simply made this in a small dish and keep it by my bathroom mirror. You can also transfer it to a small container with a lid. Store at room temperature for up to a month.
HOW TO POLISH YOUR LIPS
*Polish your lips whenever you want by applying a small amount to your clean index finger (or get some wood coffee stir sticks from your local coffee shop to use. Try to avoid sticking your fingers into it as this can contaminate the Polish.)
*being gentle to your lip tissue: use small circular motions to rub the polish across your lips using a clean finger.
*lick off (my favorite part!)
*bring the chocolatey-glow back to your summer lips.
I am always honored when birth workers around the nation and world inquire about partnering and offering the products my mother and I make in our studio to their clients/buyers. This brings me so much gratitude and joy. The sense of building the birth community on that scale.... simply makes my heart overflow.
I entered the birth community in 2015. It only seemed right to also bring the matriarch who brought me into the world into my business. My mom is my confidant, a best friend, cheer leader, and guiding parent. After convincing her to join my business on 2017, we now work together as partners in an LLC. Everything we do together is based in love.
Our base principle are integrity, honesty, innovation, and presence. This is what we bring to each other, to our business, and all of those whom we are honored to serve.
But.... please don’t ever ask me to white label sell our products to you.
This simply breaks my heart.
I take pride in what I create.
The love and intention we place in every step of our mother daughter production is sincere and real.
I have absolute respect for what others create and honor that creation as their’s.
When wanting to partner with someone and bring their amazing offerings to the families I support, I never seek to place my name on it.
I would never ask someone to white label their creativity and love.
So what about wholesale?
This also makes me feel so fortunate to have someone interested in offering our work. However, we price our product as fair as possible to make what we offer as assessable to as many women as possible. We cannot offer wholesale discounts. We can offer bulk discounts. Here’s the amazing thing which as a business woman makes me a bit sad : birth workers buying our products at our bulk discount often make more profit on our products than we do. Ouch. As a doula this does not bother me because again : we are building a sisterhood of women supporting women worldwide.
Through it all - love of color - love of community - love of support is what makes it all worthy.
I am convinced time warps when you become a parent.
Minutes can seem like hours - hours dissolve into seconds - night and day shifts....you don't know if you are completely awake or perhaps still sleeping....and for some incredible reason you adjust to this as normal.
Really puts a new perspective on what "normal" is - or better said how there is no normal.
I have been fighting a battle: Life has been full.
I am slowly re-entering.
I love my work and my family. I hold nothing but gratitude for where I am in life and for the love which surrounds me.
I am taking on a new chapter.
I am not a supermom.
I will not allow myself nor any other women to feel they should be a super mom.
I am enough.
I am coming back.
Hello: I look forward to virtually being here more.
Lots of LOVE
it is that time of season! The air is changing and becoming cooler, which always causes my lips to go through an adjustment phase that is rather ugly. They become dry, crack, and stiff. Because of that, I decided it was time to make a lip polish to moisturize and help eliminate dead skin cells.
a lip polish is great to use daily or every other day to help exfoliate the lip tissue. This is gentle tissue, so be sure not to over use this or be too forceful when exfoliating.
this is a very easy project that only takes five minutes!
what you need...
2 tbs coconut oil- I used some of my lavender infused coconut oil because lavender is great for healing.
3 tbs sugar
pinch Himalayan pink salt
1/4 tops honey
small storage jar- preferably glass or tin with an air tight lid.
mix all ingredients together and your done! See bellow for storage and how to use.
how to use....
thia recipe keeps great on the frig for 6-12 months and a little goes a looooong way. You can also keep it in your bathroom for several weeks during the winter. Because of the coconut oil, when storing in the fridge it will become more solid. Simply warm a small amount up prior to using. To use....put a small amount on a clean finger and gently use a circular motion to exfoliate lip and around lip area. Let it sit for two minutes and then rinse off. Finishing with a cocoa or shea based lip balm feels amazing!
pregnancy and postpartum have done some very interesting things to my hair over the last 2.5 years. First off, I now have several silver hairs! My hair has gone through growth, loss, thinning, shine, then becoming dull and full....Basically everything associated with the hormones of pregnancy and motherhood and nursing.
with the change of season, I decided it was time to give my hair some love. I had always used Apple cider vinegar to cleanse my scalp and give my hair extra shine and detangle, but now I am in love with a new recipe! A tea guru friend of mine let me know how beneficial different types of herbal tea can be for your hair. She explained to me that it really depends on individual hair color and type. I have dark brown, straight, thin hair, but a lot of it. In the summers I have natural blonde and many red highlights that come through. She recommended using a chamomile and green tea in the summers to strengthen and increase my natural highlights. For the winter, she recommended a black tea. I have to say, I have been using it for a week now and absolutely love it! So easy to do with great results. I did a little research online and found a lot more information on different types of tea. I really recommend checking out different teas for your hair type.
Here is how simple it is....
The One area I have found not much information on is the strength to which the tea should be brewed. Your average teabag makes 4 to 6 ounces of tea. So here is where you need to do a little math. I suggest making 1.5 cups for your hair.
What you need
1.5 cups water
16 oz. spray bottle
4 tea bags
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
1/2 tbs argon or avocado oil
Boil your water, allow the teabags to seep 4–6 minutes, have the tea cool slightly, add the Apple cider vinegar and your oil to a spray bottle and you're done!
in the shower, shampoo and condition your hair as normal and finish off by spraying this spritzer to your hair, allow it to sit a couple minutes and then rinse out. Brushing your hair while it is still damp really helps detangler. Trust me on this, my hair is almost to the bottom of my bum.
detox baths are a wonderful and a nice idea to do at least once a month. This detox bath is a little different because it uses ground dried spices instead of essential oils or floral herbs. I will explain why a little later.
The basic detox bath bass recipe is One cup Epson salt and half a cup baking soda. Epson salt is one of the best baths you can give yourself for pulling heavy metals and toxins out of your body. Definitely worth researching!
baking soda almost asked like a Mr. clean for your skin with exfoliation, pulling out of excess boils that can make acne prone. Another great area of research to check out! However, baking soda can really dry out the skin.
when looking at many DIY detox baths, suggesting to moisturize post an Epson/baking soda bath is not always talked about but so important.
this simple recipe focuses on using spices in stead of essential oils. There will be many essential oil baths to come and fresh raw herbal baths to come!
spice detox bath
1 cup Epson salt
1/2 c baking soda
1/2 tbs ground cinnamon
1/2 tbs ground ginger
1 tbs honey
1 bath melt or 1 tbs spoon coconut oil
bath tub strainer
since the baking soda can dry out the skin, the honey ask as a healing barrier to prevent any agitation the baking soda may give you.
begin by mixing your Epson salt, baking soda and spices in a bowl.
place your honey in a separate bowl.
begin your bath. Have the water as hot as possible. Please see your bowl of ingredients directly underneath your water stream. This will disperse it naturally into the tub while beginning to melt the Epson salt.
repeat this process with your honey.
use your hand to break up any spice or salt.
The bath is a beautiful dark amber color due to the spices. Place your bath melt or tablespoon of coconut oil on the side of your tub. Soak for 15 minutes and then add your moisturizer to your tub.
spice warning: The cinnamon can become slightly slimy. You will see the spices rest on your body during your bath. The cinnamon absorbs the water, giving it an interesting texture. Many people do not like this. However, for my sensitive skin and the cinnamon ad's protection against the baking soda at drying of my skin out too much. To see if you don't like the cinnamon, simply add a little to a glass of water before doing this bath so you can feel the texture.
if you do not moisturize in the tub, be sure to put on a body butter or lotion after the bath.
if you try it out, I would love to hear your thoughts and if you have a favorite detox bath please share to the Facebook page!
Being a mom is so wonderful, but can be really challenging too. One aspect I struggle with is wanting alone time to pamper myself. This is something that is actually really important to me because if I do something pampering, I feel more attractive and warm and fuzzy....which makes my relationship with my husband easier On the days baby has been very challenging so I have not even gotten to brush my teeth yet and he just walked in expecting dinner which of course is not done yet. The length of that Santander alone highlights the mood dtay at home moms can be in after those long days. Because of that, I decided to start momma Monday's. The gift to myself of 30 minutes: 10-15 to make something and 15 minutes to enjoy that something. Currently, I am focusing on my skin and moisturizing it with simple, nourishing, organic balms and body butters I can easily whip up myself.
here was my first one, and I have to say I enjoyed it immensely! Something about roses, cocoa butter, and a bath just make everything better. As always, very simple to make!
here is what you will need –
silicone candy mold
3 oz Shea butter
3 oz cocoa butter
measuring spoon and cup
syringe – this is optional but makes the process easier
36 drops of essential oils of your choice I did a uplifting and comforting blend of 16 bergamot 16 palmasora and 4 geranium.
let's talk about that dilution ratio – the amount equals 6 oz. and approx. 3/4 cups and being a nursing momma I stick to a 1 percent dilution ratio.
add your butters to you sauce pan and melt over low heat. Turn your oven off as soon as the butters are almost melted. We do not want the butters to get too hot.
transfer the melted butter's to your measuring cup, to be sure your quantity is right for the oils being used.
using your measuring cup, crush up the rosebuds gently. Remove some of the remaining solid buds and the bud ends that are now loose from the crushed up flowers.
once your butters have cooled, you can add to your essential oils. After that, add your rose buds and stir well.
pour into your silicone candy mold. It helps to stir between pouring's so not all the rose petals remain on the bottom. You can also garnish with the solid rosebuds you pulled out or sprinkle some of the petals on top. A Service – comes in handy for equaling out the candy sections if you have some that are more full or less full than others.
transfer to your refrigerator and let's set up.
these very easily pop out. Once set up transfer them to a glass jar and store in the refrigerator.
I adore being a mom. Each day is filled with small moments of joy...and some challenging ones too! All of it is just too precious.